More Breakup Songs

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I've written posts before about how music can greatly impact our moods and lives. When we are in love, we might enjoy a good love song. When we are going through a breakup, however, that is probably the last thing we want to hear! Tear-jerkers can help when you have a lot of crying to do, but you can't stay in that stage forever. Eventually, your neighbor is going to get tired of hearing you playing the same sad song over and over again. Also, your roommate might not enjoy having to duck to avoid getting hit by the darts you've been throwing at your ex's picture for the past two weeks. Eventually, you're going to have to find a way to laugh again. Toward that end, here are some break-up songs that express the sentiments many of us feel in ways that are fun for everyone else to listen to.

One of my favorite breakup songs is Carrie Underwood's 'Before He Cheats'. The whole song is funny, but here's the chorus:

And he don't know...

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up 4-wheel drive

Carved my name into his leather seat

Took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights

Slashed a hole in all four tires

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

You can read and hear the rest of the song here: http://www.metrolyrics.com/before-he-cheats-lyrics-carrie-underwood.html

I know that revenge isn't a very productive or Christian thing to do, but sometimes it's good to know that you're not alone in your feelings. That, and it's fun to imagine someone as small as Carrie Underwood beating up a pickup truck.

When it comes to song parodies, few singers are better at making us laugh than Weird Al Yankovic. Even the songs that aren't directly making fun of a specific song can still have you rolling on the floor. For example, here's one done in 50's doo-wop style:

Oh, honey, let me help you with that suitcase

You ain't gonna break my heart in two

'Cause I'd rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face

Then spend one more minute with you.

It just gets funnier as it goes on. You can read and hear the rest of 'One More Minute' here:

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/w/weird+al+yankovic/one+more+minute_20145860.html

I don't know if you've ever seen the movie The Wedding Singer, but it's about, well, a wedding singer who gets left at the altar and ends up falling for another woman. In the wedding reception after his breakup, Adam Sandler sings a hilarious version of this song by the J. Giels Band.

You love her, but she loves him

And he loves somebody else, you just can't win

And so it goes until the day you die

This thing they call love, it's gonna make you cry

If you'd like to hear it in an 'angry-female' style, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts also 'covered' this song.

You can read and hear the rest of 'Love Stinks' here:

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/j/j+geils+band/love+stinks_20250109.html

I don't know who coined the phrase, 'Laughter is the best medicine', but they knew what they were talking about. Having a few good laughs at your ex's expense is a great way to make the pain of a breakup a little less pressing. Enjoy!

Breakup songs

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Anger. Hurt. Frustration. Disappointment.

When it comes to the myriad of emotions surrounding a breakup, they can be overwhelming if we don't find a way to deal with them. One of the most effective ways I have found to 'get the feelings out' (and believe me, I've had to) is to listen to music. There's something about hearing the things you're feeling coming from someone else in 'verse form' that makes you feel understood-'Someone else gets it'. Here are some of the more cathartic songs I have found. Notice that I'm not mentioning any of the 'F*** you' songs, because those are easy enough to find on their own.

One of my favorite 'breakup songs' is 'Similar Features' by Melissa Etheridge. Here is the chorus:

Go on and close your eyes, imagine me there

She's got similar features, with longer hair

And if that's what it takes

To get you through

Go on and close your eyes

It shouldn't bother you

You can hear and read the rest here:

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/melissa+etheridge/similar+features_20091610.html

Some would say that it has a 'F*** you' element, but I personally find it more meaningful than that. I suppose that could be because it describes a situation I was in-I had an ex who messed around with a friend of mine shortly before he asked me to take him back. Whenever my friend and I would go places together, people would think we were sisters. Either way, the basic message is, 'Go ahead and think you'll be fine without me. You won't'.

When she first came out, Melissa Etheridge was considered to be rather angry in her songs. For instance, here is another favorite of mine: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/melissa+etheridge/like+the+way+i+do_20091607.html

When it comes to 'Please, please take me back', Toni Braxton does a good job in expressing it in 'Un-Break My Heart'. Here's the chorus:

Un-break my heart

Say you'll love me again

Undo this hurt you caused when you walked out the door and walked out of my life

Un-cry these tears

I cried so many nights

Un-break my heart

The rest is here: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/t/toni+braxton/un+break+my+heart_20139061.html

'Dear Lie' by TLC is another good one. There are several theories about what the 'lie' is that they're talking about. (a bad relationship, a guilty conscience, a poor self-image someone instilled in them, etc), but the basic sentiment of 'it's over now, you don't have any power over me anymore' is empowering in and of itself. 

Get out of my mouth

Get out of my head

Get out of my mind

Stop putting words in my head

Get out of my mouth, you're nothing but trouble

Get out of my life

Get outta me, outta me, outta me,

Lie

The rest is here: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/t/tlc/dar+lie+radio+edit_20188124.html

In terms of, “I know you've moved on, but I haven't yet.”, there's 'Someone Like You' by Adele:

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

Don't forget me, I beg

I remember you said

“Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead”

“Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead”

This one is quite the tearjerker. The rest is here:

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/a/adele/someone+like+you_20895042.html

Hopefully you will find these songs as helpful as I do. What are some of your favorite 'breakup songs'?

Five ways to get over a breakup

There's a saying that, “it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” That may be, but that doesn't mean that the 'losing' part doesn't hurt while you're dealing with it. Breaking up is never an easy thing to do, but there are a few ways that you can ease any pain you may be feeling.

• Get depressed. Then, get dressed. Let yourself feel sad, angry or whatever is is that you're feeling. If you don't deal with your feelings, they're just going to get worse. However, don't wallow in them for too long.
• Have a 'chick flick' party. When I had a particularly difficult breakup, my friends consoled me by throwing me a 'chick flick' party. We got together in my dorm room with several pints of ice cream, candy, soda and The First Wives' Club. This movie is one of the ultimate 'girl power' movies, which made it perfect for our 'get over him' theme. Few things make you forget the bad parts of a relationship better than Ben and Jerry's! For some reason, Cherry Garcia seems to have a particularly therapeutic effect. :)
• Remove any 'evidence' of him that you can. While you may not be able to get rid of all reminders of your ex (especially living, breathing ones!), there's no reason that you have to keep everything lying around. Put away the jewelry he gave you, that tape of love songs he made and any other 'reminders' that you can. I'm not saying throw them out because many of them do have value to you, but it might be easier to get over him if you don't have to look at his face all the time. You can bring everything back out later on.
• Enlist the help of your friends. A breakup is a good time to lean on your friends. That is one reason the 'chick flick' party was so helpful; my friends refused to allow me to wallow in self-pity and made sure I had a good time. Find ways to spend more time with your friends, particularly if you weren't able to when you were with your ex.
• Stay away from the old haunts. That nice little bistro you went to on your first date is now officially off-limits. At least, it is until you can walk by it without thinking of him. When you're trying to get over a breakup, one of the last things you need is something that will trigger wistful thoughts of the good times you had together. While it will be good to be able to remember these things later on, you might be a bit too raw for this at first.

These are just a few suggestions I've picked up along the way. I can't tell you how to deal with your particular relationships, but it's good to have a few ideas as to how to get over your ex and get back to life again.

Signs A Relationship Might Not Work Out

My parents once told me, 'never date anyone you couldn't marry.' If you think about it, it's really good advice. You don't want to waste your time with a person or in a position that isn't good for you. Life is too short to be in an unhappy relationship. There have been so many times that I've stayed in relationships longer than I really should have because I couldn't admit to myself that it wasn't going to work out. I wasted a lot of time and energy this way! In the hopes that I can save you from doing the same thing, here are a few signs that a relationship isn't going to work out.

• You and your partner are not at the same place and/or stage in your lives. This is where age can be a factor. Even if you are the same age, however, problems can crop up if you are at two totally different and conflicting places in your lives. For instance, someone still living at home while in school is probably in a different stage than an independently-living professional. A young, single person is usually in a different stage than someone who is divorced with kids. If you are working toward being in the same place in your lives, that's fine. However, things may not go anywhere if one of you is always playing 'catch-up'.
• Your expectations don't line up. If one of you is hoping for marriage while the other just wants to date and have fun, that can be a problem. Expectations often change as the relationship develops, but you need to at least have an understanding of where things are headed. If not, you might find yourself stuck in a rut. You should at least be on the same page.
• You find yourself constantly wanting to change the other person, or vice versa. It's one thing to try to get your boyfriend not to wear the bikini-girl shirt in front of your mother, but the two of you shouldn't be trying to make each other into something else entirely. While you may not love everything about each other, there needs to be an underlying respect and acceptance. Otherwise, why would you want to be in the relationship to begin with?

I'm not a therapist by any means, but these are a few things I've learned over the course of my life. I learned them the hard way, and I'm sharing them so that you may not have to. There's just one more thing I'll mention:

Above all, ask yourself if you are wiling to live the rest of your life in the same position you are in right now. Hopefully things will change for the better, but you should be prepared for the possibility they won't. The old adage of 'hope for the best, prepare for the worst' is very apt in this situation. It might very well be worth the effort needed to save a good relationship. However, if you're always trying to save it, chances are it's not a good relationship.